Hey, thanks to all of you spending your luxurious time to read my blog entries. Whenever got words I feel I can’t translate into English, I’m deeply apologize. Sorry for my poor English. I’ll use shorthand or words as best as possible to save my/yr time & energies. I don’t preach “Yeh Sou (Jesus)”. I’ll try my best to translate it from Malay or Chinese (mandarin) to English, or vice-versa (abbrev. v.v). I’ll try my best to use Chi. Words when I’m using it; if not guess you got to bear with me using pin-yin. I may switch to Jap. if I find I need to. To put things short, pls go to () to know more about me. If I didn’t add you as fren in FB, you should email me () to request me to approve yous as my friend. I’ll choose guys mostly as my friends. As I feels it’s not comfortable to share certain pics with opposite sex. Not all ppl I’ll app. Girls also OK. But (all in all) most importantly, those seeking frenship with me must (and preferably) share most opinions & thinking with me.
An autobiographical memoirs
I’ll update my blog once a week at least, so those who regularly check frown on no updating, I’m very sorry :}
Very hard to find people in this world suitably fit with me. Very aggressive grandma (former landlord named Ah Ngee) is very NAGGING. Although her words prove to be very hurtful, she did this based on strong correct reasons. I agree with her (in fact, thank her because she’d successfully mould my characters (Characters are not easily mould, esp. since I’m adult now)). Ah Ngee taught me how other people’s feelings stance, what’s play on their mind, etc. This helps me a lot to be more familiar with working world. Obviously, there’s motherly bond here. Without love, surely no naggings & my life direction-improvements. Thanks for minding my business, but I just couldn’t bring myself to start a verbal fighting.
2 Myanmese housemate (Alen & Atan) here is really a pain in my heart. My new landlord lady, Ah Pin agree to let me for RM50/mth. Ah Pin is a boss lady in a nearby restaurant I always frequented. Speaking of restaurant, I’ve other stories on its own on other section. Both Myanmese (work with Ah Pin to cooks, prep. foods,etc) always like to waste water & electric. Because of Ah Pin prepare free lodgings, food & water/electric to them, they feels that they can do anything. Never on their mind thinking that my rent RM50 doesn’t include water/electric tariff and I have to paid my money due to their apathy behaviour on resources. Any incoming bills I’ll be held accountable, thanks to their lavish usage. They also smoke heavily, threw hurtful remarks and never respect me.
Everywhere went, also feels that no one really on the same ground like me. If there’s also, it’s like a 1 in a million and also quite cheap. V.lonely. Happiness is easily built but sadness lingered on, can’t be overcome.
My view on the world is regrettably built on my over-simplistic
When I’m angered and mixed with afraid feelings (or maybe with depressed feelings as well), it’s very hard to control my motor skills. It’s very hard to be normal movement. I’d no collection of how normal movements are dictated. My hand is shivering (‘gugup’), -- like an v.old man – and leg is like that too. Maybe I was like try to control my body language so that no 1 can guess what my feelings are like but. Thus this might result in my motor performances.
Am so tired of problems. Even if in afterlife, I’m still unsure whether my life will be better or worse. What’s my direction in life, if I(as spirit) stay exists forever? Reborn? If I can choose to retain good memory and forget bitter(sweet) memories, I’ll choose to stay on forever? Or maybe I’m fated to find answer for every scientific question. Scientific questions touching on many philosophies, religion, paranormal, all sciences, etc. So, I’m still staying in this ethereal world, waiting natural death. So stressed with my stiff shoulders. My shoulders just so lack of energy.
So many people ask me (but most I just saw & knew from their facial expressions) why I’m very simple in outwardly appearances. But I’m grew tired of this. It’s very complex & it’s not easy for them to understand my complex problems. Those who judge me & think I should follow the order must know this. I knew I didn’t get myself up-to-date, didn’t bother to complement myself with all those brandish richy things. It’s all ppl’s hope that they appear nice, smart, outdo others, etc. But some are just very unfortunate the whole rest of their life that finding means to put a meal on table for old parents is a daunting tasks, that finding time to look good is near impossible. Also, no matter how heavy I put on make up, cross-dressing, appears richy or snobbish like many other actors, singers or billionaires, I could never satisfy with myself. So, there’s little point for me to put efforts to beautify myself. Even I was pressed to follow suits like other, I feels it doesn’t reflect my characters much. I’m stingy, humble, simplistic, not complicated in outward fashions, very easy-going & open-minded. I don’t like being judgemental. Unfortunately, many ppl (even old aunties too) are very judgemental if someone like me didn’t follow suits to their minimal insensible lifestyle. I feel everyone have their own problems, and it’s to them to mind their own’s business. Most nice attires are built for skinny, fits, ideal & image-conscious people. But fat men like me face another mounting task to reduce fatty layers esp. on their belly. Liposuction, face lifting, fat-absorbing cream, slimming programmes, professional coachers or dermatologist are way too expensive. Male’s corset is near to impossible to get 1. I don’t trust on quality of goods delivered via online shopping. Natural exercising is hurtful for my muscles. Although the adage no little pain, no gain rings true but I don’t want to suffer pain as well, to enjoy looking nice. It’s best to leave the way our body as it is per se and control our EQ from vicious attacks by critics.
Today I saw 1 ex-student. He realized me. He’s a type of ‘kepala-angin’, ‘tou fong’ or bad behaviour-type. He acts girlish in front of me! I knew this is not his normal behaviour. Like him, some other ppl also purposely tease me by act like this. Mostly ppl of this type are my enemies, a mild-type. Not a strong enemies. I didn’t remember of having seen ppl I knew suddenly deviant behaviour; is among my friends. Anyway, I’ve very little of friends.
Being tutors, it’s observed that guys always like to sit at the most back possible in class. I don’t know why, but I think they thought it’s macho to sit at the back of it. “Dahlah” @ It’s already my voice is so soft and barely audible, they show disrespect by having me have to use more energy to deliver my tutorials. I think it’s by nature that they dislike study. Very few of the guys will even care to show disobedient look on their face by not paying attention in class and looking elsewhere when I talk with him.Extreme Sports that I love are…
Paragliding, Hang gliding, BASE jumping, sky-diving, Snocrossing, ice skating, Snowboarding, Kitesurfing, Canyoning, Wakeboarding, Waterskiing, snorkeling, Wakesurfing, Inline skating, Playing big plastic inflatable transparent human ball, bungee-jumping in river, parachuting
Places I’d like to visit: Disneyland , Gay or LGBT Parade,etc
Card Passing games by mouth among men, truth or dare, etc
Fav Quotations : Curiosity is what drives problem-solving.
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